Prep Time: 1 beers worth
Cook Time: Don’t remember
Serves: One Tess
Difficulty: Let’s just say you can do this at 2AM after a long night of imbibing, with no plan for what you’re making.
Recommended Sides: Gatorade, Vitamin Water, Tums, Listerine, an apology letter, and a couch.
Whatever else you want
Step 1: Stay Out Late, Prepare For Morning
A few nights ago, we had wonderful evening full of friends, food, drinks, and tales of glory. We came home around 2 in the morning and heard the tummy-rumbles from a friend who skipped dinner that night. Unacceptable. Friends don’t let friends drink on an empty stomach, so we decided to make her a meal. We were not graceful while doing it, and the picture quality isn’t our best. But hey, what can you expect from a night like this:
Step 2: Get to Work
Start with bacon! While it’s cooking, chop up some bread and lather it with whatever cheesy spread you happen to have.
Step 3: Forget What You’re Doing, Burn Bacon
Oops, a little crispy. Whatever, take the bacon off and toss on 1-2 eggs. Try to keep them in relative patty form, and while this is happening toss the bread in the broiler for like 3 minutes. Also slice some tomato and grab a few leaves of lettuce.
step 4: Wash Hands And Commence the Jiggling
Take the bread out of the oven and slap everything on it. While you’re at it, slap the person next to you. Then yourself. Then the person next to you again.
Sorry about all the Simpsons references, I’ll stop now. Sandwich assemble time!!
Anyway, marmf your B.E.L.T. (bacon, eggs, lettuce and tomato) and go to sleep. You’ve had a long day.