Mystery Science Kitchen 3000

Serious Lo Mein

Prep Time: 30 minutes
Cook Time: 10 Minutes
Serves: At least 6
Difficulty: Easier than convincing your significant other to clean up afterwards
Recommended Side Dishes: Eggrolls, rice, fortune cookies, wantons, and ice cream (for dessert).

Lo Mein Noodles (whatever you can find at your Asian grocer)
2 Chicken breasts
3 Green onions
1/2 onion
3 Broccoli stalks
1 package of baby portabellas
2-3 garlic cloves
A little ginger (fresh or powdered)

For the sauce:
4 TBS hoisin
1.5 cups chicken broth
1 TBS sesame oil
4 TBS soy sauce
1 TBS chili sauce
2 TBS Sugar
2 TSP corn starch

Step 1: Marination Station (optional)
Butterfly the chicken and chop into thin strips. Throw that in a bag with a little green onion, 3 TBS soy sauce, 3 TBS hoisin, 1 TSP sugar, a little dry sherry, some oyster sauce, and a little chili sauce. I let mine marinate for a day, but you can do it for like 30 minutes or so if you’re lazy. You don’t even have to do this, but it will make your lo mein twice as awesome.

Step 2: Noodle Me, Baby
Boil some water and toss in the noodles. Turn down the heat and let it simmer for 5-10 minutes. Strain and wash with cold water and set aside. These don’t need to be warm yet, so you should get this out of the way. You can also slap people with them, or throw them on the ceiling till they stick.

Step 3: The Sauce
Combine all the liquids listed higher up and set aside. Easy step, amirite?


Step 4: Choppy Choppy
Chop up all the veggies and set aside. Combine your garlic and ginger and put in a separate bowl.

Step 5: Cooking With Love (and lots of mixing)
Put your wok on the stove as hot as it goes and add some vegetable oil. Throw in the garlic/ginger for about 10-20 seconds, just before they turn brown. Toss in the chicken (marinated or not) and keep it on until it is almost completely cooked, stirring the entire time it’s on. Next, throw in the veggies for about 2 minutes. Smother all this in the sauce and mix it all together. You want to wait for the sauce to boil and reduce a little bit, then throw in the noodles and stir. For color, you can add some dark soy and stir. For awesomeness, you can sprinkle sesame seeds on top.

Step 6: Eat A Lot (and still have a ton of leftovers)
We ours with shrimp and chicken eggrolls. It was pretty bomb.

This entry was written by rhetorock and published on March 21, 2012 at 12:21 pm. It’s filed under Recipes and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

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